shir khan

my cat died last night.

my hand was on his belly.

he was having trouble breathing. i lightly held my fingertips to his ribs as I whispered breathe baby. just breathe and he did. 2 or three more times and i felt his last.

i couldn't be sure he was gone. i didn't want to know. but he was.

i laid down on my bed and felt my consciousness merge with his.

i vibrated with the flowing strength and energy.

i sent him wholeness. healing.

i was secretly hoping for healing on this plane in this lifetime, but i now know it was not to be. i do feel that all of those good vibrations i was sending and receiving, are real. and mark my words, i have received energy he has sent to me in his lifetime,

there is a strong spirit there.

i have felt his presence and his energy, his breath and his fur, when he needed me and i was far away.

but i let him down more than once.

i have let everyone down more than once in my lifetime.

maybe that is one reason i don't know who i am.

it depends on who i'm with. who i'm listening to. who is influencing me. asking for my time and energy.

then when i get time to myself, i rebel. against some unseen enemy.

myself

my demons

so even if i win, i lose.

i"ll miss you shir khan.

all you ever wanted was love and attention

you were a wonderful companion for 10 years of my life.

thank you